Preview Mode Links will not work in preview mode

Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?


Jun 22, 2022

My guests today are David Ashcraft and Dr. Rob Skacel, the authors of a new book, What Was I Thinking? How to Make Better Decisions So You Can Live and Lead with Confidence.

In this new book, David, the pastor of a large and influential church, and Rob, a licensed psychologist and executive coach, encourage readers to embrace risk and to live their lives to the fullest potential, in order to both run and finish the race with no regrets.

David is Senior Pastor of LCBC (Lives Changed By Christ) Church in Manheim, Pa. Under his leadership, LCBC has grown from one location with a weekly attendance of 150 people and a staff of one to 18 locations across the state of Pennsylvania and a combined average weekly attendance of more than 20,000 and a staff of more than 280.

Rob began his career in clinical psychology before transitioning to a business psychology specialization. He served in senior leadership positions, in the areas of quality improvement and organizational development, in the private sector and later at LCBC Church.

3:37 – David 101

  • David has been pastor at LCBC for 31 years. He and his wife have two children and two grandchildren.

5:19 – Rob 101

  • Rob applies psychology to a business setting. He helps business leaders lead more effectively.

7:12 – Why they wrote this book

  • About three or four years ago, David had dinner with a mentor and it was an amazing experience. He then found out the man was accused of inappropriate behavior.
  • David wanted to help people make wise decisions.

12:00 – Why does inappropriate behavior happen?

  • We all have blind spots, and it’s perplexing when we see people we respect make wrong decisions.
  • Any risk-based decision comes with four propositions of risk – desire, opportunity, power and expectations.

14:00 – Small decisions become big

  • Some decisions we make involve risk. Certain decisions, like having an affair or being sexually inappropriate, don’t usually happen overnight.
  • Decisions that are small over time tend to become big and we just instinctively react.

17:09 – Entitlement issues

  • Some people make decisions based on their gut or feelings and they feel entitled to certain things.
  • Slow down and have a thoughtful process in your decision. Don’t just go with your gut and what seems right in the moment.

23:22 – How to make better decisions

  • When we’re struggling with something, we have to go right there to God and ask Him to show us things in ourselves that we need to see.
  • Ask people to come into your life to help you improve.

31:50 – How David stays vulnerable

  • David pastors a huge church. He tries to stay vulnerable, but he has to be careful who he shares things with.
  • David’s wife and children are good accountability partners for each other.

36:59 – Creatures of God

  • As you grow as believers, there are ups and downs. You’ll never truly arrive.
  • In the midst of success, remember you are a creature of God and fully reliant on God.

39:44 – Speaking the truth in love

  • If you see someone heading down a bad path, it can be difficult to talk to them about it.
  • It’s worth speaking up, but do it in love.

45:45 – Truthful feedback

  • If all the feedback you get is critical, your relationship won’t go very far.
  • You need to offer positive, truthful feedback that shows you care.

53:25 – Get to know you

  • David’s favorite TV show growing up? Leave it to Beaver
  • Rob’s favorite dinner? Steak
  • David’s dream he has yet to achieve? Traveling to new places
  • Rob’s favorite music? Thomas Rhett’s Slow Down Summer

FEATURED QUOTES

Any risk-based decision comes with four propositions of risk – desire, opportunity, power and expectations. – Rob

Moral failures don’t happen overnight. It starts gradually. – David

Slow down and have a thoughtful process in your decision. Don’t just go with your gut and what seems right in the moment. – Rob

When we’re struggling with something, we have to go right there to God and ask Him to show us things in ourselves that we need to see. – Rob

CONNECT:

https://www.bhpublishinggroup.com/products/what-was-i-thinking-2/

Thank you to our partner of the show!

Are you looking to clean up your household cleaning products this year? MamaSuds would like to help! The best way is to simply start with one product. Every time you run out of a specific cleaning product, replace it with a non-toxic one. Another tip, purchase a product that has multiple uses. The MamaSuds Collection has many multiple use products (castile soap or the toilet bombs are just a few!). Their blog has lots of great tips and a castile soap recipe that you can print and make a lot of your own effective cleaners! Give them a try at www.mamasuds.com and don't forget to use the coupon code MOLLY for 15% off your order!