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Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?

Jun 19, 2019

Do you have an item or two (or seven) in your closet that you’ve held on to for a long time and you’re not sure why? It doesn’t fit or it’s out of style but it holds some type of significant meaning to you… whether we realize it or not… a lot of our identity, personal history, and even sometimes our self-esteem can have a significant connection to what’s hanging in our closet… we hold onto things that maybe… just maybe we should let go of.

3:50 – The Essense 101

  • As a child, Essense wanted to rebel against being dressed in the same outfits as her sister. Once she found her first job in retail she took full advantage of her 30% employee discount and she began to cultivate her own style.
  • In college, Essense started to define and explore her own style, but worried people would only know her for clothing. She wanted to be known for her personality as well.
  • Today, Essense fully embraces her personal style as a way to show others who she is.
  • While working as a paralegal, Essense’s style would attract attention from her coworkers who requested help with shopping on lunch breaks.
  • Sometimes the best way to start is by jumping in the deep end: Essense changed her Instagram profile to say “Paralegal by day, personal stylist by night” before she ever had her first client.


9:32 – More Than Just Hangers and Shoeboxes


  • Essense realized her skills could help others when her first closet organization client found healing in cleaning out a closet after a hot water heater disaster and a dramatic weight loss journey.
  • So many of us look for control in the midst of loss and life-altering events. Often when we feel out of control, we spend our time and energy controlling our belongings or letting them control us. 
  • Closets are a metaphor for the things in our lives that we keep hidden. When we clean out our homes, we are forced to face the things we’ve been holding onto.
  • Essense helps transform lives by cleaning up the literal and figurative mess in people’s lives and provides structure to help her clients overcome personal obstacles. 


18:40 – God and The Door in the Dining Room


  • Essense has a close relationship to her mother and believes there’s a very specific reason she didn’t leave home until she was 25.
  • Through a shared dream, Essense finds confirmation of where her mom is now and where her mom will be eternally. (This part will give you chills – the good kind).


26:04 – Legacy Through Faith


  • Essense’s mom left a beautiful legacy of faith, and Essense honors her mom’s legacy by giving glory back to God with every step of her career.
  • After finding her mom’s old business cards, Essense carries on her mom’s boutique with D.E.F.Y. Fashion and a unique take on camo jackets.


29: 47- Winning the Super Bowl


  • Without any connection to the NFL, Essense’s jackets show up at the Super Bowl two years in a row.
  • You can attract the market you want with clientele who understand the value of what you have to offer.
  • “They could wear anything, but they chose to honor my work at a legendary moment.”
  • Our outer appearance can be a reflection of how we feel on the inside, and Essense gives glory to God by reminding others to celebrate what makes their story unique.